Living With Your Introvert/Extrovert Roomie

By Erika Taylor

Illustration by Erika Taylor

Illustration by Erika Taylor

So you’ve done the “easy” stuff: you found an apartment, started paying your rent (on time!), and got most of your furniture. Now comes a new task – living peacefully with your roommate! Your roomie might be an introvert or an extrovert, meaning their sensitivity to social stimulation might be different than what you’re used to. Although people don’t necessarily fit into just one of the categories, it is important to understand situations that you might find yourself in.

PRIVACY

  • Introverts need to feel that their home is their sanctuary – where they can unwind without being mobbed with social responsibility. When your introvert roomie gets home after a long day, let them breathe for a little while before your start bubbling up about your day.
  • Extrovert people also need some privacy. Though they might generally enjoy social interaction more than most people, it doesn’t mean that they don’t enjoy some R&R once in a while. Before you assume that they’ll automatically be on board with you inviting your 5 friends over for game night, be sure to check with your roommate first!

GOING OUT

  • Introverts tend to interact better in settings with a few people. Going out to brunch or mini-golf might appeal more than going to that new club that just opened! Be prepared for you introvert roomie to leave early, but don’t take this as boredom or an insult, they just need to be by themselves and decompress.
  • Extroverts adapt more easily to social situations than others, but don’t always assume that your extrovert roomie wants to go out every weekend. They might be fine with wine and movie night, all you have to do is ask if they want to hang out in the apartment!

CONVERSATION

  • Introverts typically don’t talk that much! Sometimes their mind might be focused on other things, or they might just not have much to talk about. If this is the case with your roomie, don’t take this as a sign of aloofness or insensitivity.
  • Extroverts are known to lead conversation, but even this is not always true! Be prepared for the time when your extrovert roomie is not as talkative. They’re not mad at you or in a mood, they just might need to quietly reflect what’s going on in their life at the moment.  Don’t be concerned, just wait until they are ready to share.

It’s important never to make your roomie feel uncomfortable in their own home. The best way to avoid most uncomfortable situations is to sit down, talk it over and set guidelines for each other. After all, you’re both in this together!

Erika graduated from Marymount University in 2015. This Beyonce-loving city girl has a thing for DIY, entertaining, and everything Italian. She currently works in Washington, DC. and recently moved into her first apartment. She cannot wait to share her journey with all our readers.

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