Comments on: How to tell your roommate his girlfriend is a problem http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/ Sat, 11 Feb 2012 15:47:07 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Tommy Boy http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/comment-page-2/#comment-62783 Tommy Boy Mon, 12 Dec 2011 07:05:09 +0000 http://wptest.myfirstapartment.com/2007/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/#comment-62783 I've Been Living with this exact problem for three months now. My roommate has decided to move in his annoying girl friend whom i do not like in the least. they have been staying in the room every night together and are in the room a majority of the day as well even though his girl friend has a town house and no roommate. they like to do such activities as dry hump with me in the room. i have brought the issue to his attention several times however i get bs excuses such as her bed is too hard or she doesnt have a tv. some of these people just do not get the message until somebody snaps. the RA is the next to hear about it because i am at the end of my rope. I’ve Been Living with this exact problem for three months now. My roommate has decided to move in his annoying girl friend whom i do not like in the least. they have been staying in the room every night together and are in the room a majority of the day as well even though his girl friend has a town house and no roommate. they like to do such activities as dry hump with me in the room. i have brought the issue to his attention several times however i get bs excuses such as her bed is too hard or she doesnt have a tv. some of these people just do not get the message until somebody snaps. the RA is the next to hear about it because i am at the end of my rope.

]]> By: Cliff http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/comment-page-2/#comment-62290 Cliff Fri, 09 Dec 2011 22:28:25 +0000 http://wptest.myfirstapartment.com/2007/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/#comment-62290 im currently living with my best friend from high school. we had went to separate colleges so only saw each other every other month so one month he comes back and says he is taking over his parent apartment and i should move in, im like hell yeah roomin with my best-friend would be awesome. but as satan jumped in he brought a gf into the mix. he decides to move his gf of 3 months in too. who is loud, inconsiderate and disrespectful to no end. weve been here for five months now and ive endured god knows how many moments on annoyance where she didnt wash her dishes, speaks on the phone on loud speaker daily, hogged the internet to watch cartoons, rants and raves about guy smells in a house full of guys. it all came to a halt today when i asked her to remove her laundry from the washer and she acted like child and responded that sounds like a you problem. we had had this issue before so i was even more pissed at her response. i began explaining to her how that was unfare to which she screamed and picked up a frying pan and swung at me. i put her in a head lock till i removed the frying pan from her, then she called my best friend and he took her side saying its normal for people to just leave there luandry around and that i should just use the tub when she was blocking the washer i thought to gut them both but i calmed down and am now looking for a new place and new friends. im currently living with my best friend from high school. we had went to separate colleges so only saw each other every other month so one month he comes back and says he is taking over his parent apartment and i should move in, im like hell yeah roomin with my best-friend would be awesome. but as satan jumped in he brought a gf into the mix. he decides to move his gf of 3 months in too. who is loud, inconsiderate and disrespectful to no end. weve been here for five months now and ive endured god knows how many moments on annoyance where she didnt wash her dishes, speaks on the phone on loud speaker daily, hogged the internet to watch cartoons, rants and raves about guy smells in a house full of guys. it all came to a halt today when i asked her to remove her laundry from the washer and she acted like child and responded that sounds like a you problem. we had had this issue before so i was even more pissed at her response. i began explaining to her how that was unfare to which she screamed and picked up a frying pan and swung at me. i put her in a head lock till i removed the frying pan from her, then she called my best friend and he took her side saying its normal for people to just leave there luandry around and that i should just use the tub when she was blocking the washer i thought to gut them both but i calmed down and am now looking for a new place and new friends.

]]> By: Lourdesita22 http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/comment-page-2/#comment-59693 Lourdesita22 Mon, 21 Nov 2011 00:25:43 +0000 http://wptest.myfirstapartment.com/2007/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/#comment-59693 I am mostly directing my comment to the Long winded and Ever defending person calling himself ANNOYED.People just don't understand that you could be the nicest person in the world. The other person did not sign up to essentially live with you. You have got to go . You finding somewhere to hang till your girlfriend is home is not good enough - find somewhere else to crash -period. It's not fair to have another person in the space -no time at all , staying over is a no no. Take you and your cooking some place out of the space . She did not sign up to live with you.Point Blank I am mostly directing my comment to the Long winded and Ever defending person calling himself ANNOYED.People just don’t understand that you could be the nicest person in the world. The other person did not sign up to essentially live with you. You have got to go . You finding somewhere to hang till your girlfriend is home is not good enough – find somewhere else to crash -period. It’s not fair to have another person in the space -no time at all , staying over is a no no. Take you and your cooking some place out of the space . She did not sign up to live with you.Point Blank

]]> By: Meredith http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/comment-page-2/#comment-52987 Meredith Mon, 10 Oct 2011 21:05:07 +0000 http://wptest.myfirstapartment.com/2007/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/#comment-52987 Yes! This is exactly what I'm going through--my roommate is unwilling to change his ways, and I'm getting so fed up that I'm basically paying for a freeloader. The other thing is that they are so in love and attached that it's sickening. I really want to ask both of them to get the f&&k out at this point and I'll find another friend to live with, because I'm not moving out just because he fell in love too goddamn fast. He's really messing up my experience in what would have been an awesome apartment... Yes! This is exactly what I’m going through–my roommate is unwilling to change his ways, and I’m getting so fed up that I’m basically paying for a freeloader. The other thing is that they are so in love and attached that it’s sickening.

I really want to ask both of them to get the f&&k out at this point and I’ll find another friend to live with, because I’m not moving out just because he fell in love too goddamn fast.

He’s really messing up my experience in what would have been an awesome apartment…

]]> By: Applehat http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/comment-page-2/#comment-46058 Applehat Sat, 03 Sep 2011 08:38:24 +0000 http://wptest.myfirstapartment.com/2007/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/#comment-46058 First off let me just say-FOR THE LIFE OF ME....I do not understand how 2 people literally can be with each other LITERALLY 24 hours a day. what happened to me time? I lived in a place with 4 rooms and 4 girls. I had to go through the "boyfriend from hell" not once, not twice, but three fucking times. 1 roommate number one had a boyfriend who refused to shower and played and BROKE our xbox360, rock band equipment,and our wii. And was always trying to hit on us when she wasn't there. -What killed me about this, was they had a room yet they still saw fit to suck face, smoke, and have sex in our common room. we kicked her out only to get another love sick jackass of girl 2 roommate number two was needy and sickly, if she wasn't actually sick she would certainly be faking it for the attention. which made her 9000lbs boyfriend do everything for her, even bathe her, how do I know? because they never closed their door and they happily had sex out in the open and walked around naked. we kicked her out to get our current queen of shitty bf 3 roommate number three literally has a man that never leaves her side. she takes online classes and has her grocceies delievered to her so she stays in 6 out of 7 days of the week, thus he says 6/7 its to the point now where he calls us his family, and our place HIS home @____@ and we constantly keep telling her to have him leave(he lives in our complex a floor above!) and she keeps insisting his not being here for 1 day out of the week breaks her heart too damn much. So do what I do when your roomie's bf/gf is overstaying their welcome. be blunt and let them know that they will have to pay some rent if they're gonna be there that much and if you need to, break them up First off let me just say-FOR THE LIFE OF ME….I do not understand how 2 people literally can be with each other LITERALLY 24 hours a day. what happened to me time?

I lived in a place with 4 rooms and 4 girls. I had to go through the “boyfriend from hell” not once, not twice, but three fucking times.

1 roommate number one had a boyfriend who refused to shower and played and BROKE our xbox360, rock band equipment,and our wii. And was always trying to hit on us when she wasn’t there.
-What killed me about this, was they had a room yet they still saw fit to suck face, smoke, and have sex in our common room.

we kicked her out only to get another love sick jackass of girl

2 roommate number two was needy and sickly, if she wasn’t actually sick she would certainly be faking it for the attention. which made her 9000lbs boyfriend do everything for her, even bathe her, how do I know? because they never closed their door and they happily had sex out in the open and walked around naked.

we kicked her out to get our current queen of shitty bf

3 roommate number three literally has a man that never leaves her side. she takes online classes and has her grocceies delievered to her so she stays in 6 out of 7 days of the week, thus he says 6/7

its to the point now where he calls us his family, and our place HIS home @____@ and we constantly keep telling her to have him leave(he lives in our complex a floor above!) and she keeps insisting his not being here for 1 day out of the week breaks her heart too damn much.

So do what I do when your roomie’s bf/gf is overstaying their welcome. be blunt and let them know that they will have to pay some rent if they’re gonna be there that much and if you need to, break them up

]]> By: Annoyed http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/comment-page-2/#comment-44131 Annoyed Wed, 24 Aug 2011 15:32:38 +0000 http://wptest.myfirstapartment.com/2007/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/#comment-44131 I once lived with a friend whose gf stayed for days on end in the apartment and was in effect an non-paying tenant, which was a nightmare and ended up in a serious row and lost frienship. So I am acutely aware of the problems which a free-loading bf or gf can cause of they over stay their welcome. But I also have a view from the opposite side of the issue. My girlfriend lives in a duplex apartment with another girl who is also the landlady. I live in another town 4 hours drive away, and usually visit once a week for one or two nights, sometimes on the weekend and sometimes during the week. I am self-employed while my gf works in an office, so if I stay over during the week or on Saturday's when she is working I usually bring my laptop so I can get some work done myself while she is out during the day. When she comes home, we cook dinner, get a dvd, go out or whatever, often with the landlady. Recently, the landlady told my gf that I have to vacate the house if my gf isn't there, as she said she "doesn't feel comfortable" with me being there on my own. Now, prior to this I have only ever met this girl when with my gf. We have had numerous conversations and evening together and I thought we all got on fine, as did my gf, and my gf and her are good friends. She has never been in a position with me, that I can think of, to have made her feel ill at ease. We have never had any disagreements, never any conflict over food or washing up etc. I bring my own food, or buy groceries for the house, every time I stay. I never eat food that doesn't belong to me or my gf. I use my gf's en-suite bathroom. I cook for both of them regularly - at the landlady's request, I add - as I'm a decent chef and the landlady has said that likes my style of cooking. I'm tidy and live out of a small backpack when I stay. I perfectly understand that this is her house, that she has every right to set whatever rules she wishes, and that I am a guest. But her demand means that I either wander around the town for the 9 hours that my gf is at work (which means that I get none of my own work done), or I don't visit for more than a single evening / night. After her initially telling my gf that I could stay whenever I want, I take this as a bit of an insult - not just the realisation that she doesn't trust me, but we get on well enough that I would have expected her to have the courtesy to say something to my face. I feel it also shows a lack of trust in my gf's judgement. My gf is also confused. And now it means I unfortunately don't get to see my gf as much, unless I decide to take days off work to wander about for 9 hours till my gf comes home, or spend 8 hours on the road to go back and forth between my place and hers, which is just not realistic. I think the solution is always communication - address these issues up front before they become problems. I guess for my part it is partly my own fault for not raising the issue myself with my gf's landlady earlier - explaining that I would like to stay dring the day just one or two days a week and why, and seeing if she was cool with it, and if not then whether there could be a compromise. Likewise, if you find that your flatmate's partner is constantly living in your face, you need to speak up; discuss the issue(s) in a rational and adult manner - explain what the problem is, look for middle ground if there is any, and if not then by all means put your foot down and say "enough is enough". You shouldn't lose a friend if you ask them to work with you on solving the problem, but if you do then maybe they're not the friend you thought they were. I once lived with a friend whose gf stayed for days on end in the apartment and was in effect an non-paying tenant, which was a nightmare and ended up in a serious row and lost frienship. So I am acutely aware of the problems which a free-loading bf or gf can cause of they over stay their welcome.

But I also have a view from the opposite side of the issue.

My girlfriend lives in a duplex apartment with another girl who is also the landlady. I live in another town 4 hours drive away, and usually visit once a week for one or two nights, sometimes on the weekend and sometimes during the week.

I am self-employed while my gf works in an office, so if I stay over during the week or on Saturday’s when she is working I usually bring my laptop so I can get some work done myself while she is out during the day. When she comes home, we cook dinner, get a dvd, go out or whatever, often with the landlady.

Recently, the landlady told my gf that I have to vacate the house if my gf isn’t there, as she said she “doesn’t feel comfortable” with me being there on my own. Now, prior to this I have only ever met this girl when with my gf. We have had numerous conversations and evening together and I thought we all got on fine, as did my gf, and my gf and her are good friends. She has never been in a position with me, that I can think of, to have made her feel ill at ease. We have never had any disagreements, never any conflict over food or washing up etc. I bring my own food, or buy groceries for the house, every time I stay. I never eat food that doesn’t belong to me or my gf. I use my gf’s en-suite bathroom. I cook for both of them regularly – at the landlady’s request, I add – as I’m a decent chef and the landlady has said that likes my style of cooking. I’m tidy and live out of a small backpack when I stay.

I perfectly understand that this is her house, that she has every right to set whatever rules she wishes, and that I am a guest. But her demand means that I either wander around the town for the 9 hours that my gf is at work (which means that I get none of my own work done), or I don’t visit for more than a single evening / night.

After her initially telling my gf that I could stay whenever I want, I take this as a bit of an insult – not just the realisation that she doesn’t trust me, but we get on well enough that I would have expected her to have the courtesy to say something to my face. I feel it also shows a lack of trust in my gf’s judgement. My gf is also confused. And now it means I unfortunately don’t get to see my gf as much, unless I decide to take days off work to wander about for 9 hours till my gf comes home, or spend 8 hours on the road to go back and forth between my place and hers, which is just not realistic.

I think the solution is always communication – address these issues up front before they become problems. I guess for my part it is partly my own fault for not raising the issue myself with my gf’s landlady earlier – explaining that I would like to stay dring the day just one or two days a week and why, and seeing if she was cool with it, and if not then whether there could be a compromise. Likewise, if you find that your flatmate’s partner is constantly living in your face, you need to speak up; discuss the issue(s) in a rational and adult manner – explain what the problem is, look for middle ground if there is any, and if not then by all means put your foot down and say “enough is enough”. You shouldn’t lose a friend if you ask them to work with you on solving the problem, but if you do then maybe they’re not the friend you thought they were.

]]> By: Derek http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/comment-page-2/#comment-43674 Derek Mon, 22 Aug 2011 02:06:42 +0000 http://wptest.myfirstapartment.com/2007/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/#comment-43674 I see that this is a very common problem as I am myself stuck in this situation. My roommate is my best friend (and consequently the landlord as well) of the house I'm currently living in. He's recently been very serious with this girl over the past 3 months. She's over here nearly everyday and I've come home to basically seeing her always snuggled up on the couch in the living room with my best friend. I want to be happy for him, I really do..but there's a part of me that doesn't. Is that wrong? I don't think there's a simple answer to that question. However, back to my story. One of the worst parts about this situation is that my roommate understands how I feel and can relate. However, he told me that he can't help but to feel strongly towards this girl and yet refuses to accept that our friendship has changed. He still feels like me and him should be best friends despite the fact he spends all his free time with her. Before she entered his life me and him used to watch sports and shows in the living room all the time. Now, I'm lucky if I can get in 2 or 3 words. I've tried just letting things go but I hear them constantly "going at it" upstairs in his room at all times of the night. I started to feel jealous, for natural reasons. So combined with her taking up space in a house that I rent in, I have to deal with all these emotions on top of essentially losing a very good friend. I've known him for over 10 years, he's a great person and I don't want to see this friendship slip away. However, how can you talk with to your roommate about his girlfriend problem if he's always with her? Just thought I'd like to share. Had to say something just to get it out. I see that this is a very common problem as I am myself stuck in this situation.

My roommate is my best friend (and consequently the landlord as well) of the house I’m currently living in. He’s recently been very serious with this girl over the past 3 months. She’s over here nearly everyday and I’ve come home to basically seeing her always snuggled up on the couch in the living room with my best friend.

I want to be happy for him, I really do..but there’s a part of me that doesn’t. Is that wrong? I don’t think there’s a simple answer to that question. However, back to my story.

One of the worst parts about this situation is that my roommate understands how I feel and can relate. However, he told me that he can’t help but to feel strongly towards this girl and yet refuses to accept that our friendship has changed. He still feels like me and him should be best friends despite the fact he spends all his free time with her.

Before she entered his life me and him used to watch sports and shows in the living room all the time. Now, I’m lucky if I can get in 2 or 3 words. I’ve tried just letting things go but I hear them constantly “going at it” upstairs in his room at all times of the night. I started to feel jealous, for natural reasons.

So combined with her taking up space in a house that I rent in, I have to deal with all these emotions on top of essentially losing a very good friend.

I’ve known him for over 10 years, he’s a great person and I don’t want to see this friendship slip away. However, how can you talk with to your roommate about his girlfriend problem if he’s always with her?

Just thought I’d like to share. Had to say something just to get it out.

]]> By: Charle http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/comment-page-2/#comment-19694 Charle Wed, 02 Feb 2011 18:18:23 +0000 http://wptest.myfirstapartment.com/2007/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/#comment-19694 My story is very much the same. I am room mates with my brother's best friend from high school. Well, we used to have another room mate(who was a girl) that actually paid rent and helped out sometimes with the house. After she graduated and moved out, we get another room mate, another kid that graduated with my brother(brother's in a different state by the way) Things go well for a while because he's a nice guy, but then he brings his girlfriend into the mix. At first, it's very subtle, she stops by every now and then. Now it's become very frequent. She's over every other day. The nicest thing to at least get on my good side would be to acknowledge my existence as a room mate that is paying his rent, but nope. She's a complete free loader that is only staying here thanks to banging my room mate( the loud noises over the vents are proof enough they're doing dirt) When I get home, I have to imagine the idea of someone already being their, taking my own parking space which I should have rights to in the first place. And then I have to share the bathroom with 2 people, instead of one person. Now she sleeps over every other night. We had a huge snowstorm, and my room mate(either madly in love or completely moronic) braved the harsh conditions just to go pick his girl up..... So I fell for everyone that is put into this situation. I think what it will boil down to is I'll tell the landowner at the end of my lease that I liked the place, but if I'm paying rent for an extra room mate, I'd rather take my chances in the smelly, freshman populated dorms any day of the week... My story is very much the same. I am room mates with my brother’s best friend from high school. Well, we used to have another room mate(who was a girl) that actually paid rent and helped out sometimes with the house. After she graduated and moved out, we get another room mate, another kid that graduated with my brother(brother’s in a different state by the way) Things go well for a while because he’s a nice guy, but then he brings his girlfriend into the mix. At first, it’s very subtle, she stops by every now and then. Now it’s become very frequent. She’s over every other day. The nicest thing to at least get on my good side would be to acknowledge my existence as a room mate that is paying his rent, but nope. She’s a complete free loader that is only staying here thanks to banging my room mate( the loud noises over the vents are proof enough they’re doing dirt) When I get home, I have to imagine the idea of someone already being their, taking my own parking space which I should have rights to in the first place. And then I have to share the bathroom with 2 people, instead of one person. Now she sleeps over every other night. We had a huge snowstorm, and my room mate(either madly in love or completely moronic) braved the harsh conditions just to go pick his girl up…..
So I fell for everyone that is put into this situation. I think what it will boil down to is I’ll tell the landowner at the end of my lease that I liked the place, but if I’m paying rent for an extra room mate, I’d rather take my chances in the smelly, freshman populated dorms any day of the week…

]]> By: Chev http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/comment-page-2/#comment-19451 Chev Sun, 30 Jan 2011 20:03:00 +0000 http://wptest.myfirstapartment.com/2007/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/#comment-19451 Im glad Im not the only one, I have a unique situation. My roomate started dating the neighbor on the otherside of our duplex. First off let me say that the only reason they are together is because I had the balls to go over and initiate contact with our neighbors. Well now they are in "love" and she is over twenty four seven. Even when he leaves for work she stays until her lazy ass gets out of bed. She showers and watches TV at our house! Even though her house is fucking 10 feet away. Thats the part that really gripes me. I had a partial understanding because Ive been in a situation where my girlfriend stayed over a lot. He was not my roomate at this time, but I let her sleep in occasionallly so she didnt have to DRIVE home right away. This bitch is literally 10 feet away! I mean come on. This really pisses me off, life was so much better when he wasnt pussy whipped by his girlfriend. My other roomate has a GF but she is never over and is really good about not overstaying her welcome. Uggh and to top it off is I got this guy a job and am is manager at work. Its my family business and If I confront him it will make thinks akward at work. Well I moving out in a couple months thank god. Im glad Im not the only one, I have a unique situation. My roomate started dating the neighbor on the otherside of our duplex. First off let me say that the only reason they are together is because I had the balls to go over and initiate contact with our neighbors. Well now they are in “love” and she is over twenty four seven. Even when he leaves for work she stays until her lazy ass gets out of bed. She showers and watches TV at our house! Even though her house is fucking 10 feet away. Thats the part that really gripes me. I had a partial understanding because Ive been in a situation where my girlfriend stayed over a lot. He was not my roomate at this time, but I let her sleep in occasionallly so she didnt have to DRIVE home right away. This bitch is literally 10 feet away! I mean come on. This really pisses me off, life was so much better when he wasnt pussy whipped by his girlfriend.

My other roomate has a GF but she is never over and is really good about not overstaying her welcome. Uggh and to top it off is I got this guy a job and am is manager at work. Its my family business and If I confront him it will make thinks akward at work. Well I moving out in a couple months thank god.

]]> By: Sean http://www.myfirstapartment.com/2009/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/comment-page-2/#comment-11840 Sean Tue, 16 Nov 2010 02:36:37 +0000 http://wptest.myfirstapartment.com/2007/05/how-to-tell-your-roommate-his-girlfriend-is-a-problem/#comment-11840 I have the same problem with my roomates girlfriend. I never thought I would actually hate someone as much as I do her. She is around 23 and still lives with her parents. So our place has turned into their "sanctuary" for her. I actually had a talk with him about it and thought things would actually change. I can see now that he is so goddamn whipped that he didn't have the balls to reiterate to her what we talked about. So now I decided to go the passive-aggressive route and to email him a link to this page and hopefully he gets the point. If not, I told him that the clock is ticking before I just tell her myself and make it super awkward. Well....for her and him, I am past the point of giving a fuck. I have the same problem with my roomates girlfriend. I never thought I would actually hate someone as much as I do her. She is around 23 and still lives with her parents. So our place has turned into their “sanctuary” for her. I actually had a talk with him about it and thought things would actually change. I can see now that he is so goddamn whipped that he didn’t have the balls to reiterate to her what we talked about.

So now I decided to go the passive-aggressive route and to email him a link to this page and hopefully he gets the point. If not, I told him that the clock is ticking before I just tell her myself and make it super awkward. Well….for her and him, I am past the point of giving a fuck.

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